December 11, 2004 • 2:03 pm

Wow. It's been awhile since I've written in here. Things have been busy on my end of things, and with the holidays coming up soon, they are even more soon. I can't wait to go home for Christmas in DC. It is my thing to do every year. Right now though, I've been busy working on my second album. I had some studio time in Los Angeles, but I've also gone across the Atlantic to record some there with one of Madonna's producers. Spent some time in London. Caught a couple of shows, and royally embarrassed myself by attending an after show party for Phantom of the Opera a bit underdressed. There I was surrounded by a bunch of people all dressed up, guys wearing suits, and I was just there casual. If I known it was more of a fancy thing, I would not have gone, but once I was there it was too late.

Things have been so busy on my end, and I know things are pretty hectic with AJ too, so we haven't been able to talk much. Seems we are playing this never-ending game of phone tag. I'm really excited about the holidays coming up. It'll be nice to be around the family again. I can't really wait.
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November 30, 2004 • 12:41 pm
mood: busy

Wow things get crazy, and I don't find the time to sit here at the computer. Traveling, studio time, the holidays. All of it makes for a very busy. If all goes to plan, all the studio time in the past months and in future months will have a new album out in stores from me sometime this summer. Yes, that means by next Christmas right? I'm not promising the summer date because of everything that happened with Schizophrenic. I am just hoping those same problems don't visit this album.

I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving. I was in Florida for the weekend. Went out a couple of nights. Did the party thing. It seems I always end up in Miami around the holidays. Maybe its just because its warmer. I'm not sure. It just ends up that way. I'm looking forward to Christmas too. I'm taking part in Holiday auction on Ebay for the Grammy Charities. You can see my auction here. I have provided the charity with a signed shirt, hat and CD. Need to help in anyway you can during the holidays. It isn't all about getting but giving.

Speaking of getting though. I picked up Kelly Clarkson's new CD earlier, and I have been giving it a listen. Good stuff. I'm not even sure which journal she is at right now. It seems she moves journals a lot. Maybe I'll go look up where she is at right now in a second here.

Haven't been able to talk to AJ much in a bit. We're both busy with our own things. We seem to be playing an endless game of phone tag. We expected this. We're both busy with our own things. Then you have the added business of the holidays, and things get even more crazy. I'm sure we'll find each other soon. With our luck, we'll end up at the same event and not even realize it til we're both there.

One more thing before I go, my semagic says today is the birthday of one lovely Elisha. Happy birthday, sweetheart. Have a wonderful day.
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November 18, 2004 • 8:47 pm
mood: busy

Another busy week, going here and going there. Combining studio time with time going out to events. This weekend I escorted Eva to the American Music Awards. If you caught any of that coverage, you probably notice a change in my look. Yes, I know it has been changing a lot over the last few months. Different hairstyles and looks in clothes. I seem to have picked up the spectacle look again. Yes, I wear glasses, but I just don't usually wear them out in public much.

The awards are always fun to go to and see. It's cool watching the performances ad getting to see everyone in one place. Eva was there to introduce and present Bon Jovi with the AMA's equivalent of a lifetime achievement award. After the show, hit the parties. People keep asking Eva and I about us, but we say we're not together. Like AJ just said, the more we deny it, the more they will think we are in fact dating.

Been appearing on a lot of the entertainment shows. Both for appearing at the awards and for the fact that Gap ad I did is finally airing. In fact, the ad just started airing today. It is a part of the new holiday campaign that the Gap is doing. The campaigned is called "How you share it." My commercial is one of three that are airing. For my spot, I did a cover of the Earth, Wind and Fire song, Shining Star. If you happen to be a fan of ER, you might have caught my ad during one of the commercial breaks tonight.

Earlier this week, I attended a party for Nintendo too. It was a pre-launch party for their new hand held system that goes out in the market on the 21st. Just a few days from now. Trent was there. He was there as a part of the event. It was good to see him. Although we didn't get to talk a whole lot.

Things just keep getting busier, and then there are times when I am doing nothing. AJ is off somewhere else while I am here. We play phone tag, and we get those rare times when we do get to see each other. We talk as much as we can, and we had one of those awkward discussions last week. I think it came out okay. We both wanted to be going to awards together, but he was going to one on the other side of the world from me. We got things working though. It was good we talked. If only we both weren't so busy all the time. What is meant to happen though. That is what will happen. I really believe that. AJ just called, and its kind of hard to type and talk at the same time, so I'll end this here.
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November 9, 2004 • 3:21 am

It's been awhile since my last update. Been busy working on things, and then AJ came back into town. You know how that goes. He called me the night he got back into LA, and I headed over to his place. All the nights of playing phone tag, missed phone calls, nights apart were over. Spent a few nights with him actually. He let me sleep some, and he knocked out from time to time. It's amazing when he sleeps he looks like this totally different person. He isn't the strong silent type when he sleeps. He just looks totally relaxed. Yeah, so I happened to watch him sleep one time.

When I haven't been with him, I've been busy working. Getting stuff together for my next album. I'm looking forward to working with some of the people I worked with on Schizophrenic again. BT and Dallas Austin. Things are moving slowly. Life has just been really mellow for me lately. Mellow in a good way. Allows me to work on what I want to work on, and see who I want to see.

It seems an alternate version of the Some girls has been leaked online. You can find that here. I guess that's it for now.
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October 30, 2004 • 6:34 pm

So what day is it? Saturday? Sometimes my head gets so focused on what I am doing I forget what I am doing. Right now my current focus is working on my next album and AJ. Those are my two focuses.Last week I talked about going to Vegas in order to attend an afterparty following the RMA's. There was some confusion about that. First I was to be a host, and then I was listed as a special guest. I never made it to Vegas, so I didn't even attend the party. I am working hard on the next album. I want this to be just as a good if not better than my first, and I hope it does better sales-wise than the first did. I just love music and making music. I could spend all say in the studio tweaking a track until it is done.

Things with AJ are good. We've actually been able to catch each other on the phone a couple of times this week. I never know exactly what time it is where he is, so I've been letting him call me. He's pretty good at knowing when to call by now. We talk about whatever he is doing, whatever I am doing, tell each other how much we miss each other, and then usually he needs to run off to do this or that. We're both busy, and since we're both working on our own albums right now, we're even more busy than usual. I really do enjoy that he understands where I am coming from. With so many relationships with celebrities you have to be worried if the other person will get mad at you for your schedule. He hasn't once because his schedule is just as busy as mine. Every moment we are able to spend together, whether it be face to face or on the phone, is something I look forward to. I just wish he was here in Los Angeles with me, and not halfway across the world.

I took a small break from the studio to attend another election function. The other night I attended the Rock & Republic fashion show in Culver City. If you've seen the pictures floating around, you might have noticed I have grown a bit of a beard. It probably won't last, but I have it now. With the election so close in the near future, it is important to get out there and vote. This election is in the hands of the American people. and you have to have your voice be heard.
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October 24, 2004 • 1:33 am
mood: tired

Studio. It's where I've spend a lot of my nights and a lot of days lately. Having one in my house works well, but sometimes I like going to the actual studio to work on stuff. I get ideas for songs and melodies from the weirdest things. I'll hear something, and the next thing I know I'm in the studio playing around with stuff and trying to make it into something I can call my own. when I go into the studio, I create so many tracks. There is more than enough for one album, and sometimes there is so many that there are extra songs.

This week my first road journal was posted on my site. I talked about a song I made originally to be made for Schizophrenic, but it didn't make it on the album. We were going to save it for the second album, but it looks like it will be released on the site. It would have been already, but there has been a delay. I think delay should probably become my middle name, but we won't get me going again on all the problems I've had with my first album and the touring.

Monday I'll be in Vegas hosting an after party after the Radio Music Awards. Should be fun. I'll get to see a lot of people, and you know parties are fun to go too. Hosting is something I'm used to because every year we host parties when we do Challenge for the Children.

I just wish I was someplace else sometimes. That I wasn't so busy, and he wasn't so busy. We both have filled schedules, and it really isn't our fault. It is what we do. He's off working on the Boys record, and I'm here working on mine and being Mr. Social. I called him the other night, and we talked while he finished packing. I think he was headed off to Sweden. I was tired, and he was yelling at me about how I should go and grab something to eat and crash. I have this bad habit of staying all day in the studio and forgetting to eat. He says the way I do things I'll end up being a toothpick before I know it.

Tried calling him the next night, but he didn't answer, so I left him a voice mail. It's time like this I miss him though. When he's thousands of miles away, and all I have is the sound of his voice. I know we can handle this. We both understand where the other is coming from. We're taking things as they come, and each day we learn something new about each other we didn't know before. We tell each other random things. Even leave them on voice mails. Trust me, we know the phone companies love us. Things will work out just fine.
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October 16, 2004 • 10:48 pm
mood: calm

So it seems the cycle is one week I'm busy and the next I'm not. Last week I wasn't. This past week that just ended was. Time spent in the studio working on some new material, and some time spent out and about in Los Angeles. I attended another voting party earlier in the week. The election is just a matter of weeks away, and it is so important to get people out there and vote. It really doesn't matter which man you choose to punch your ballot for. It just matters that your voice is heard. I'm all for helping getting the word out in anyway that I can.

The next night I attended a concert Richard Marx had, and I did a little surprise performance. Richard was responsible for This I promise you off of No Strings Attached. He had performed it once with us on our Christmas special a few years ago. The song was what made his transition from singer to songwriter, so I came out and sang my verse with him singing the other. It was good. I've always enjoyed working with him, and I'd love to someday have him work with me on a collaboration for one of my albums. Never know when that might happen, but I would really like it too.

Music Freedom has had some problems getting out the next new track out. It was supposed to be out a couple of weeks ago, but just like everything else when it comes to me it has been pushed back as well. It should be out soon hopefully. I'll try to work on sharing it here somehow. We'll see how that goes.

After spending the rest of the week in the studio, getting what I needed done, I decided to head down to where AJ is for a couple of days. Arrived earlier. I won't be able to spend but a couple of days here, but I know he understands that. He's always really cool when it comes to what I need to get done. He's even learned to deal with when inspiration seems to strike me at 3am and I need to get something down right then before I lose it. We've both got busy lives.

It seems lately with the popularity of Eva's new show, the questions have moved to her. Now that the press know who she is. She's pretty much come out and said we're not dating. She's focusing on her career right now. We're good friends, and that is about it.

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October 8, 2004 • 6:01 pm
mood: content

It's funny how one week you are and there. Just everywhere, and the next you're not. Actually, it was kind of nice having this week kind of light. Yes, there are things going on, but they are not things that I need to be out in the public eye for. Back on Tuesday night, the new Music Freedom was unveiled. It was actually meant to happen the night before at midnight, but there was a slight delay. Just like there was a slight delay on the night of the actual unveiling as well. Instead of Midnight PST, the site went live just a bit later on than that, but it was up, and things look good. It's the home of myself and another band right now.

The day following the reopening of the site, an unreleased track of mine was supposed to be put up on the site for download, but yes there has been another delay. One that will hopefully not last too long. Once the song is up on the site, I will see what I can do about sharing it on here with all of you.

The quietness in my own life has allowed me to spend some time with AJ. He returned to stateside from Japan earlier on this week, and I went over to his place as soon as I knew he was home. It was good to see him. To just be there standing in front of him instead of being on a phone line with him thousands of miles away. I'm trying to work on getting out of a couple days of studio time next week, so that I can go down to see him and the guys in Mexico. I was supposed to head to something in New York City early on next week, but those plans seemed to be scratched as soon as they were made. My schedule is constantly changing. Sometimes I don't even know what I'm doing until that day it seems.

It's good though. Keeping busy. Working on my music. Seeing people. Being seen. Getting my name out there. Yes, people know me as one of those guys from *Nsync, but I want to be known as more than that. As we can see *Nsync is more than likely a thing of the past. That can change, but I'm trying to not think about it too much.

Right now I'm focusing on me. I'm feeling really good right now. Everything just seems to be falling into place in a lot of areas of my life. The other morning when I was over at AJ's he caught me singing in his kitchen as I made the two of us breakfast. He laughed and just shook his head. I continued to cook, and it was just good. Things are just good. It's good to feel happy.
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October 2, 2004 • 2:57 pm
mood: busy

Damn! Who thought I would get so busy? Honestly, I am constantly on the go now. Studio time and working on Music Freedom is still high up there. This week, however, I was quite the man about town. I'm still here in Los Angeles, and things are going really well right now. I'm busy, and I'm happy to be busy. My mind is even in constant motion. Things are coming into my head, and I am creative. I have new musical ideas hitting me all the time, and you don't know how happy that makes. I'm not just sitting around on my ass doing nothing. I'm taking control of my life and my music. We all know jive didn't truly support Schizophrenic, so for my next album, I'm getting myself out there. I'm getting myself seen.

Back on Monday night, I attended the premiere for The Ten Commandments with Eva here in Los Angeles. She is becoming a good friend, and we do hang out a lot. Of course, the press is going to make more of it. She is in the public eye right now because of her new show, and I am always in the public eye because of who I am. Everywhere her or I are seen, the press asks about us. We just say whatever we have to make the press happy and shut them up. She knows we're just friends.

Then on Wednesday, I attended the WB's Rock the Vote party on the Warner Bros studio lot. I think it is so important with the election coming up soon to get out there, and get your voice heard. Your voice is silent if you don't go to the polls on the election. It doesn't matter which of the candidates you are voting for. I am keeping up with the election myself. I actually listened to the recent debates while I was driving to another event the other night. I'm not going to say who I am voting for. That is between me and my own ballot. I think both men have valid points, and I plan on following the debates closely, and hopefully make an informed decision for myself on election day.

The last two nights I've attended an event here in Los Angeles for Macy's and American Express. I sing. I dance. I have acted. Now I can say I've modeled. I walked down the catwalk on both nights of the event. I modeled clothes by Tommy Hilfiger. It was for charity, and I was happy to do it. I'm used to posing for a camera, with all the photoshoots I've done in the past, but walking down a catwalk is totally different. This event was in support Macy's Passport which has assisted in getting the word out there about HIV and AIDS. They have raised over eighteen million for research and educational programs.

Before I headed out last night, I tried to call AJ. It seemed we had been missing each other the last few nights. We finally caught each other, and we were able to have a good long talk. We both admitted to missing each other some. We tried to keep the sap to a minimum, but I have missed him. We're on totally different sides of the world right now, but it really can't be helped. He is busy with his thing, and he knows I've got my own deal right now. We talked about things with us, and I brought up the recent press with Eva. Just so we know we're on the same wave length. I had to run off to go to the show, but it was good getting to hear his voice, and I'm really excited that he will be back in Los Angeles for a bit before he goes off to Mexico. I was looking forward to trying to see if I could go with him, but I just got told this morning I might have to make an appearance in New York City right around the time he heads off to Mexico. So, we will have to see what happens there.

I hear Joey is in town for a bit. He needs to call me, so we can hang out. You hear that, Fatone?

Before I go, I want to wish a Happy Birthday to Tiffany, and an early happy birthday to Kevin and Ashlee. I hope you all have wonderful days full of happiness. Now I'm off!

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September 27, 2004 • 6:39 pm
mood: calm

Rumors. We all have to deal with them at some point in our careers. Some of us have to deal with them more than others. They are either put out by the press or by other sources, and they can turn into big ugly messes. Over my career, I've had my share of rumors spread about me. Most of them being in the romantic department.

Other the past month alone, I've had three rumors circulate about my love life. My name has been linked to three woman saying that we're dating or in some way something happened between us. First it was Bai-ling. We were photographed together at a nightclub last month, and the rumors began to fly. We were dating everyone said. Just because I meet up with someone at a club and we spend time together, that doesn't mean we are dating. Of course those rumors led to another rumor about my not going to China to perform. Rumors seem to breed rumors.

Now, it seems another rumor about my love life has been published in People magazine. I think I even said this would happen when I mentioned attending the Emmy's with Eva Longoria. People has quoted me as saying, "I think she is pretty special." So now according to People, her and I are a new couple and dating. Again it is further from the truth. We're not. We attended an event together, and yes she is a lovely girl. Yes, we are friends, but anything more than that is a total rumor.

Rumors even were made around here. I'm sure a good number of you saw this past week's issue MBP Best Week. That little tidbit about Kim Caldwell and I was quite amusing and so not even true. It only made me laugh really. Her and I are friends, and she is best friends with my younger sister Heather. Someone tried to make the argument that Kim comments me all the time. Kim happens to comment a lot of people all of the time. Does that mean something is going on between her and all of them too?

Like I said rumors are rumors. Half of them are true. Half of them are false. To me I've always gone straight to the person and asked them what is up before I believe anything I hear or see. A true rumor you've probably heard or seen by now is that I'm possibly filming an ad for the Gap with Sarah Jessica Parker. It is still in the works, and I'm not saying I'm definitely doing it until it films. It has been in talks for weeks now, but I wanted to keep it quiet in case it did fall through. It looks to be a bit more solid now, but you never know what might happen when it comes to things I'm doing. Things seem to fall through so easily.

I caught the Surreal Life again last night, and that show amuses me so much. The whole relationship with Brigette and Flav is interesting to watch. I actually read somewhere that VH1 is doing a spin-off show following Brigette and Flav around. Filming for that starts next week I think if it happens. If it does, that should definitely be interesting.
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